Couples and relationship therapy in California

Helping couples repair trust, improve communication, and build more secure, connected relationships.

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When Is It Time for Couples Therapy?

Research suggests that couples wait an average of six years after problems begin before seeking professional support. It’s safe to say that if you’ve found yourself on this page, it may be time to bring in some outside support to help you sort things out with more clarity, care, and efficiency.

I work with couples at all stages of relationship, including those who are dating, premarital, newly married, or navigating major life transitions such as deciding whether to have children, moving cities, career changes, or discerning whether the relationship should continue.

Couples therapy may be a good fit if you:

  • keep having the same argument over and over without resolution

  • struggle with communication or emotional safety

  • are rebuilding trust after betrayal or broken agreements

  • feel distant, disconnected, or more like roommates than partners

  • want to strengthen your relationship before problems grow deeper

A couple sitting on a white couch, engaged in an intimate moment, with the woman leaning forward and the man holding her hands.

How I Work With Couples

My work with couples is primarily informed by the Gottman Method and Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), two evidence-based approaches that focus on teaching you skills and tools to strengthen communication, find emotional safety, and create secure attachment. Gottman tools help couples understand the patterns that lead to conflict, while EFT helps partners access and express the deeper emotions underneath those patterns.

I also integrate parts work and trauma-informed approaches when relevant. Many couples conflicts are shaped by earlier attachment wounds or protective parts that get activated in moments of stress, and exploring those pieces together can help partners understand each other in a completely new way.

  • The Gottman Method uses practical, research-based tools to improve communication, reduce conflict, and strengthen friendship and trust within the relationship.

    I’ve completed Level 1 and Level 2 training in the Gottman Method (there are 3 levels) and am currently working toward full certification in the model.

  • Focuses on the deeper emotional and attachment needs beneath conflict, helping partners feel seen, understood, and securely connected.

  • Helps partners understand the protective parts that show up in arguments so reactions can soften and communication becomes more compassionate.

  • Explores how past relational experiences shape current relationship patterns and helps both partners build greater emotional safety together.

Relationship Dynamics I Specialize In

Rather than simply mediating arguments, we slow down the interaction patterns happening between you and your partner. Together we identify the cycle the two of you get stuck in and learn how to interrupt it so you can move from defensiveness and blame toward curiosity, empathy, and real communication.

This work often includes communication tools, emotional processing, and understanding how each partner’s nervous system and attachment history influences the relationship.

the roommate phase

For couples who love each other but disconnected, emotionally distant, miss the spark, or can’t seem to find their way back to each other.

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the same fight on repeat

For couples stuck in the same argument over and over. The topic may change, but the cycle of defensiveness, frustration, and feeling misunderstood stays the same.

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talking past each other

For couples who talk to each other but struggle to find resolution due to communication breakdowns, missed bids for connection, or the constant feeling of not being heard.

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the pursue–withdraw dynamic

One partner wants closeness while the other pulls away. The more one reaches for connection, the more the other shuts down, creating an exhausting cycle.

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at a crossroads

For couples wondering whether the relationship can change or if it may be time to separate. Therapy can help clarify what is happening and what each partner truly wants moving forward.

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when old wounds show up

Sometimes past trauma, family-of-origin dynamics, or old attachment wounds spill into the relationship. Arguments escalate quickly because the past is quietly shaping the present.

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Ways to Work TogetheR

In Person Sessions

50 and 75 minutes
in Long Beach, CA

A couple sitting close on a white couch, engaging in an intimate moment and looking into each other's eyes.

Virtual Sessions

50 and 75 minutes
for California Residents

Two women sitting close together, looking at a large open book or journal, one woman's arm around the other's waist, in a cozy indoor setting.

Therapy Intensives

Half-Day or Full-Day
Virtually or in Long Beach

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Meet your Couples therapist,
Clara Mackinlay

A woman with long wavy brown hair, wearing a sleeveless white turtleneck top and hoop earrings, sits on a green chair in a room with a large potted plant and a woven wall hanging.

I’m a couples therapist who knows relationship healing from both sides of the couch. I know firsthand the pain of mismatched attachment styles, repeating the same arguments, and trying to heal trauma while in partnership, and I also know the work it takes to build a long-term partnership grounded in peace, mutual respect, and real understanding.

Before becoming a therapist, I developed a deep fascination with love and relationships, largely because I spent many years in the wrong ones. I became obsessed with understanding how people get stuck in unhealthy dynamics and how to break those patterns. That curiosity led me to work in the UCLA Relationship Research Lab, where I reviewed and coded hundreds of hours of couples conflict, analyzing body language, tone, microexpressions, and patterns of conflict and connection.

I also spent six years working alongside trauma-bond relationship expert Dr. Nadine Macaluso, widely known for her public story as the former spouse of Jordan Belfort (The Wolf of Wall Street). Together we authored her extensively researched book Run Like Hell, which unpacks the dynamics between narcissistic partners and their victims and provides a roadmap for leaving and healing.

My approach to couples therapy is shaped by both this lived experience and extensive clinical training. I take an integrative, whole-person approach that helps couples understand not only their communication patterns, but also the family systems they were born into, the relational dynamics they carry forward, and how nervous system and attachment patterns contribute to conflict.